What are Smiley-face Tricks? Based on the work of Mary Ellen ...
What are Smiley-face Tricks? Smiley-face tricks are a fun way to get you to think and write more creatively. She was angry at her sister. becomes She was so angry at her sister for not helping her with her math homework that she grabbed her sisters geometry homework, crumpled it into a ball, and slam - dunked it in the trash!" How does this relate to the NJ Holistic Rubric? By using smiley-face tricks, youll find yourself having fun while elaborating on your writing. Your teachers have always told you that you need to SHOW NOT TELL.. WELL.. Here is a FUN and CREATIVE way to do this and REAL authors use this and even better. IT WORKS! I n scor ing, consider the grid of wr itten
language I nadequate Limited Command Command Score Content And Organization 1 May lack opening &/or closing Uncertain focus 2
Minimal response Partial Command Adequate Command 3 May lack opening &/or closing Attempts to focus
May shift focus Attempts organization Few, if any, transitions between ideas May lack opening &/or closing Usually has a single focus Strong
Command 4 Generally has opening &/or closing Single focus 5 Some organization May lack some transitions
between ideas Ideas loosely connected Transitions clear No planning evident, disorganized
Details lack elaboration Lists ideas Usage Many serious errors Many errors Sentence
Construction Variety of incomplete and/or incorrect sentences Many errors No sentence variety Mechanics Errors so
severe they detract from meaning 6 Has an opening & closing Single focus Sense of coherence Key ideas developed Logical sequence of ideas Attempts
compositional risks Relatively fluent Appropriate and varied details Effective and vivid details Has an
opening & closing Single focus Coherent Welldeveloped Logical sequence of ideas Fluent, cohesive Compositional risks effective Repetitious details Several unelaborated details Errors/patterns of errors may be evident
Uneven development of details Few errors Very few, if any, errors Little sentence variety Some errors
Some errors that do not interfere with meaning Some sentence variety Few errors Appropriate & effective sentence variety Few errors Few errors Very few, if any, errors
Very few, if any, errors Many errors Superior Command Obvious patterns of error No consistent pattern of errors Some errors doesnt
interfere with meaning Magic Three Three examples in a series can create a poetic rhythm and add support for a point, especially when the three items have their own modifiers. Look at the example from The Paper Bag Princess by Robert Munsch. What three verbs & modifiers does the author use to add support? Magic Three Elizabeth was a beautiful princess. She lived in a castle and had expensive clothes. She was going to marry a prince named Ronald. Unfortunately, a dragon smashed her
burned all her clothes with his fiery breath, and carried off Prince castle, Ronald. (The Paper Bag Princess) TRY IT.. Think of a problem youve had and write a simple sentence. NOW. Add a Magic Three to your sentence and watch the magic happen! Possible starter: I was so angry that. Figurative Language Non-literal comparisons add zing to our writing and can help paint a more vibrant picture for the reader. Some examples are similes, metaphors, hyperbole, onomatopoeia, personification, alliteration, assonance, etc. Figurative Language
When the sky is full and singing with stars you know that twilight has given way .... Twilight Comes Twice by: Ralph Fletcher TRY IT.. Use one or more types of figurative language to rewrite the following sentence: The wind was strong. Challenge: Can you use a Magic Three AND figurative language to elaborate this sentence? Humor Whenever possible and appropriate, try to infuse a little humor to keep your reader alert. I want you to wake up your readers emotions and what better way to attract attention than by using humor! Hyphenated - Modifier
By connecting two or more adjectives together with a hyphen, it imparts an air of creativity and cleverness to our writing. Sometimes a new way of saying something can make all the difference; hyphenated adjectives often cause the reader to sit- up and take notice. I give him Marcels special Turn-on-theCharm-and Give-Them-the-Big-PearlyWhites smile. All of the Above by Shelley Pearsall TRY IT.. There once was an old woman. OR He flashed her a wicked grin. Try elaborating either one of these sentences using either humor or a hyphenated-modifier. CHALLENGE: Can you use both smiley-face tricks in one sentence?
Quick Write Put Your Heads Together For the next couple of minutes try writing a paragraph using as many of the smileyface tricks we talked about so far based on the following explanatory prompt. Work as a table group! Repetition for Effect Repeat an important word, phrase etc. to stress its importance. Use this trick to get your readers attention. EXAMPLE: Today I wore a red hat, not just any red hat, the red hat from my grandma, not just any grandma, my grandma. TRY IT. Tell why Stanley was so unhappy using Repetition for Effect. Example:
Stanley was very unhappy, not just unhappy, but really, really unhappy, so unhappy that he was horribly unhappy. Expanded Moment Take a moment that you would ordinarily speed past, and develop it fully to give your reader more details, to make that moment more life-like. Preparation: Write descriptive words for how a pillow feels i.e. fluffy, puffy, billowy, cushiony, etc. Activity: What other imagery words can you add. Write down 5 words that describe the feeling of mud. Share and list on the board.
Follow-up: How do the words convey the feeling of things. Expanded Moment Preparation: Write words that evoke smells i.e. popcorn, brownies, roses. Activity: Have students list other words that describe pleasant smells. Then have them list words to describe unpleasant smells (sour milk, garbage, rotten eggs, etc.) Follow-up: Talk about how words can describe specific smells.
Dog at a Park Sight: pink tongue, dark, almond-shaped eyes, small & brown animals, twitching ears Touch: soft fur, heaving sides Smell: soft wind blowing Taste: Sound: high-pitched sounds only dogs can hear Example of an expanded moment I watch Georgia run through Thompson Park I am out of breath when I finally catch up with her. I run my hand along her back, soft as a feather pillow. I pat her heaving sides and scratch her ears, but she hardly acknowledges my presence. I command her to sit, and she does so, but her mind is elsewhere. Her ears twitch as she tunes in to the sounds that I cannot hear. Georgia strains to catch the slightest whisper in the air. Her pink tongue pulses from her lips. Her dark, almond-shaped eyes are fixed
on something small and brown. And then suddenly she is off, lickety-split, on another wild goose chase. (At the Park with Georgia) TRY IT. Close your eyes. Pretend you are in a boring language arts class and are daydreaming of someplace else youd rather be. Become aware of your surroundings. List your senses, then write an expanded moment using these senses. First List Your Senses..
Sight: Touch: Smell: Taste: Sound: Then, use your imagination. Specific Details for Effect Every new word increases a writers power. Try to keep vocabulary natural. A thesaurus can be a good friend to a writer, but only if it is used sparingly and with thought. Writing works best with specific words that are carefully chosen to create a vivid picture in the readers mind. Play around with the words until they sound good. Dont say, The dog was big and mean. SHOW DONT TELL! Say. (Now you try it!) A hundred pounds of snarling
yellow fur launched itself from the porch, straining at a rope thin as spaghetti. Full-Circle Ending When writers include an image or phrase at the beginning of a piece of writing and then mention it again at the end, it gives their piece a sense of closure. If you give a mouse a cookie, Hes going to ask for a glass of milk. When you give him the milk, hell probably ask you for a straw. When hes finished, hell ask for a napkin. Then he will want to look in a mirror to make sure he doesnt have a milk mustache. When he looks into the mirror, he might notice his hair needs a trim. So he will probably ask for a pair of nail scissors. When hes finished giving himself a trim, hell want a broom to sweep up. Hell start sweeping. He might get carried away and sweep every room in the house. He may even end up washing the floors as well! When hes done, hell probably want to take a nap. You will have to fix a little box for him with a blanket and a pillow. Hell crawl in, make himself comfortable and fluff the pillow a few times.
Hell probably ask you to read him a story. So youll read him one from one of your books, and hell ask to see the pictures. When he looks at the pictures, hell get so excited hell want to draw one of his own. Hell ask for paper and crayons. Hell draw a picture. When the picture is finished, hell want to sign his name with a pen. Then hell want to hang his picture on your refrigerator. Which means he will needscotch tape. Hell hang up his drawing and stand back to look at it. Looking at the refrigerator will remind him that hes thirsty sohell ask for a glass of milk. And chances are if he asks for a glass of milk, hes going to want a cookie to go with it. APPLICATION Eleven by Sandra Cisneros Work with your table group and see how many smiley-face tricks you can find! Label them in the margin
Be ready to share. OTHER METHODS OF ELABORATION Action Verbs = She was clutching tight to her daughter. Adjectives = Your skinny feet were devoured by oversized working boots. Adverbs = The sky whispered gloriously in unison. Allusions = Its still vividly colored in my mind, like Georgia OKeefes American abstract paintings.
Analogies = Here comes real friendship, the real friend. Behind her is a caravan of white horses, each with a gold saddle on its back, waiting for us to pick one on which to ride back to her castle, a place with princess in shining armor and fairies on wings soaring at breath taking heights. METHODS OF ELABORATION CONTINUED.. Anecdotes = It seemed our family always had problems. Mommy always had woman problems, so she had to leave with some doctor. Daddy used to have a drinking problem. Mels Bar is really missing his business now. I wondered if we had missed any problems. I remember those days Definitions = He studied the thing as if he were a carrion-eating bird, a vulture METHODS OF ELABORATION CONTINUED..
Descriptions = He was an 83-year old, myway-or-the-highway , beer-drinking, cigar-smoking, cowboy-hat-wearing man. Dialogue = I hear shes anorexic. Thats how she dropped all that weight. Quotations = Someone said I think it was Shakespeare that friendship comes and friendship goes, but love lasts forever. METHODS OF ELABORATION CONTINUED.. Reasons = One of the main reasons that girls are different from boys is their appearance. Its a commonly known fact that girls carry the contents of a survival kit and everything including the kitchen sink in their purses. Sensory Images = He takes her hand while asking her to dance. She blushes with a grin capable of reaching across the state of Texas and even farther.
How to Use Smiley-Face Tricks Keep these Smiley-Face Tricks in your binders/ notebooks all year as a reminder of various stylistic devices. Incorporate a certain number of Smiley-Face Tricks in each writing piece,. Look for Smiley-Face tricks in your short stories/novels or independent reading books. Make note of the ones you like and use them again and again in your writing!
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